Nothing Like A Good Ole Fashioned Dumpster Fire

The New York Football Giants are a miserable excuse for a football team. I’m disgusted to the point of needing to vomit, and no my excessive drinking during the game has nothing to do with it. This team, week after fucking week, further cements themselves as the laughing stock of the league. I’m shaving off years of my life watching these games.

The Atlanta Falcons aren’t some juggernaut who deservedly should have blown the Giants’ hinges off. Nope, this was a battle of two teams whittling away at the bottom of their divisions which should have ended up being a shitty field goal exhibition. What ended up happening instead was the Giants exposing themselves for the inadequate douchenozzles that they are, and making the Falcons look like Steve Sarkisian was a smart coach rather than a fumbling alchy.

The offensive line is hot garbage, and rather than attempting to gameplan around that Pat Shurmur decides to go ahead and playcall as if he doesn’t have 5 disabled gorillas in front of him. Eli Manning’s asshole is puckered tighter than an Amish returning from rumspringa. James Bettcher seems to only know how to call defensive plays like a 12 year old who just discovered blitzing in Madden. Clock management is worse than Andy Reid half baked after his halftime hoagie. The fucking game was tight in the first half!! This should never have been such a simple loss.

Nothing will come of this, Pat Shurmur will have a sassy press conference and defend himself like a preteen while finding a way to blame Odell. The ownership is too prideful to admit their team has no glory left in the bank to rest their laurels on. Dave Gettleman doesn’t have enough power to make substantial changes during the season. The only bass ackwards hope the Giants fan base has is that there is no hope. The best course is that this team continues to blow their own dicks off and secure a top draft pick and hope for the best.

P.S. Saquon was still the right choice, that little muscle bound freak is the only bright spot on this team. With any luck there is somewhat of a decent roster around him next year and he skull fucks every defense in the league.

End rant. I’m back.

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