I'll keep it short and sweet. Tom Brady is probably the greatest of all time. But he is the absolute worst person. Don't believe me? Just watch this video. https://youtu.be/uWysxeBVgYw Pretty sure I just got cancer from watching that. Granted I feel that way anytime I watch Saturday Night Live but this was worse. Maybe … Continue reading The Goat.
Yes, you read that right. No, I didn't hit my head and believe it's Christmas time. I'm talking about motherfucking tax return season. MY CHRISTMAS. I work my ass off all year long and my family takes every penny I make. This is my time. The only chance I can look my wife in the … Continue reading It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
I usually don't do these because they are almost never right and impossible to predict but here goes anyway. 1) Arizona Cardinals Biggest needs: OL, DL, CB Nick Bosa, DE, Ohio State Bosa has been consensus #1 on all mock drafts I've seen. He can get to the backfield from anywhere on the Defensive Line. … Continue reading My 1st Mock Draft
After a long hiatus, your favorite terrible father is back. Having kids really really puts a damper on your blogging but this motherfucker just filled his adderall prescription and I'm ready to go. Today I'm going to give you a list of the worst shows your future kids will watch and why they are so … Continue reading I’m back
Ok so I've really been slacking lately on here so here goes. Blog #1 Parents at movie theater. So I took my oldest to the movies today to see the grinch. As we are waiting for the movie to start a group of 8-10 kids walk in with ages ranging what looked to be 6-10 … Continue reading 3 blogs in 1 because I’m a lazy piece of shit.
Fuck you Lando. I went to target for some dress clothes I needed and goodfellows failed me. Searched for 30 minutes and couldn't find anything for big men. 30 seconds in Walmart and found everything I needed. George collection > Goodfellows. Suck it you stupid hymen. I will agree though me and Dickey are fat … Continue reading Rebuttal to no free ads
So I'm laying in bed and my wife is watching my 600lb life and the lady literally walks down a hallway and then leans up against a wall and slides down it. The producer ran up to here because they thought she was having a heart attack. Seriously people I'm no pinnacle of health, but … Continue reading Fat people are gross
Ok so I'll get straight to the point on this one. How does a grown man make new friends. Yeah I have these cocksuckers who also write on this page (excluding G-Mac because fuck that guy) but now that we are all getting old and washed up, mainly me, we don't see each other and … Continue reading How does a person make friends?
I miss the days when things were made to last. Now things are built cheap and cost a fortune. It seems like I'm going through a pair of headphones every 2-3 months now a days. I don't abuse them when I'm done with them I wrap them up neatly and low and behold they still … Continue reading Fuck you Apple
So for the past 4 years of parenting I've been pretty lucky. As much as I bitch parenting sucks my kids are relatively easy. That changed today when I hit that point when I definitely need to watch what I say. Today my 4 year old said fuck. As my wife was yelling I was … Continue reading Hardest part about parenting