Fuck you Lando. I went to target for some dress clothes I needed and goodfellows failed me. Searched for 30 minutes and couldn't find anything for big men. 30 seconds in Walmart and found everything I needed. George collection > Goodfellows. Suck it you stupid hymen. I will agree though me and Dickey are fat … Continue reading Rebuttal to no free ads
So I'm laying in bed and my wife is watching my 600lb life and the lady literally walks down a hallway and then leans up against a wall and slides down it. The producer ran up to here because they thought she was having a heart attack. Seriously people I'm no pinnacle of health, but … Continue reading Fat people are gross
Ok so I'll get straight to the point on this one. How does a grown man make new friends. Yeah I have these cocksuckers who also write on this page (excluding G-Mac because fuck that guy) but now that we are all getting old and washed up, mainly me, we don't see each other and … Continue reading How does a person make friends?
I miss the days when things were made to last. Now things are built cheap and cost a fortune. It seems like I'm going through a pair of headphones every 2-3 months now a days. I don't abuse them when I'm done with them I wrap them up neatly and low and behold they still … Continue reading Fuck you Apple
So for the past 4 years of parenting I've been pretty lucky. As much as I bitch parenting sucks my kids are relatively easy. That changed today when I hit that point when I definitely need to watch what I say. Today my 4 year old said fuck. As my wife was yelling I was … Continue reading Hardest part about parenting
I'm going to add to what Lando posted earlier by saying Fuck the environment. My parents or grandparents didn't think of me when they were destroying the planet, so why should I care. I have a hard enough time remembering what I went to the store for, so you can bet your sweet ass I'm … Continue reading Hot Take
I'm going to try and post these every so often. If your child asks you to taste something, definitely look at it before you taste. A few weeks back I was working on some paperwork and my daughter asked me to try something. It's not an uncommon thing for her to hand us some of … Continue reading Quick parenting tip
Is there something in the water these days that make all women basic? My almost 4 year old daughter asked for a pumpkin spice candle at the store. She wears Uggs. My wife took her shopping and bought her a little north face. I took her to the Apple store with me to get my … Continue reading Basic Bitches
I decided to start a weekly power ranking to give me a reason to write more. Two things going into this you need to be aware of. 1. I don't care about all about wins and loses, I'm going by how I believe each team did this week. 2. I don't care about your opinion. … Continue reading My totally biased power rankings week 3
Alright so since most of you have no idea who I am I'll give you a few details. I'm 6'5 316 lbs of Bearded man meat. I also have what the ladies refer to as "Resting Bitch Face". I just look angry all the time apparently. I can't count how many times I've been asked … Continue reading Why People?