Fuck you Lando. I went to target for some dress clothes I needed and goodfellows failed me. Searched for 30 minutes and couldn't find anything for big men. 30 seconds in Walmart and found everything I needed. George collection > Goodfellows. Suck it you stupid hymen. I will agree though me and Dickey are fat … Continue reading Rebuttal to no free ads
Ok so I'll get straight to the point on this one. How does a grown man make new friends. Yeah I have these cocksuckers who also write on this page (excluding G-Mac because fuck that guy) but now that we are all getting old and washed up, mainly me, we don't see each other and … Continue reading How does a person make friends?
I'm not sure what made me wake up with a positive attitude today, I could be suffering from a dangerous brain tumor that is making me delusional but who's gonna complain. The psychoticly happy outlook, in my opinion, is due to the beautiful time of the year we find ourselves in. I'm not talking about … Continue reading We Are Officially Into The Greatest Time Of The Year
Is there something in the water these days that make all women basic? My almost 4 year old daughter asked for a pumpkin spice candle at the store. She wears Uggs. My wife took her shopping and bought her a little north face. I took her to the Apple store with me to get my … Continue reading Basic Bitches
I'm an asshole. I'm well aware of this fact, and honestly, I'm kind of content with it. I don't expect to change, and I'm fully aware of the repercussions of being this way. I know that this isn't going to always make things easy, but it does make me self-aware enough to recognize that this … Continue reading Hot Take: The Text Break Up Is Totally OK.
Alright so since most of you have no idea who I am I'll give you a few details. I'm 6'5 316 lbs of Bearded man meat. I also have what the ladies refer to as "Resting Bitch Face". I just look angry all the time apparently. I can't count how many times I've been asked … Continue reading Why People?
Just take a good, long minute to try and absorb what is going on in the above picture. This is not some post found from someone else on Twitter, this is from my own personal fucking Snapchat! THIS IS SOMETHING I HAD TO LIVE THROUGH! Here's the situation, entered the bathroom to handle some business … Continue reading Some Things Just Need Divine Intervention To Explain
Chewing loudly. People being late. People who talk about being vegan. People who stand still on the left side of the escalator (Hello NYC.) Those who don't say 'Thank you' when you hold open a door for them. All of these people are fucking awful. I will though, enter my pick for the absolute worst … Continue reading I Have Found My New Pet Peeve
Fuck you, GMac. When you're wrong, you're wrong, and I need to say something about it. I am ALL the way in with the new Space Jam moving with Lebron in it. I think from every single perspective it's an absolute slam dunk (huge pun there, folks.) Let me get this out of the way first, … Continue reading Counterpoint: I Am All The Way In On Space Jam 2
I remember a time when the cool thing was to have a different ringtone for each person in your contacts..... Not anymore. There is nothing more annoying than being somewhere quiet and some moron's phone going off with their ringer on full blast. You can feel the mood in the room change as the younger … Continue reading It’s 2018. Put your damn phone on vibrate