Yes, you read that right. No, I didn't hit my head and believe it's Christmas time. I'm talking about motherfucking tax return season. MY CHRISTMAS. I work my ass off all year long and my family takes every penny I make. This is my time. The only chance I can look my wife in the … Continue reading It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Just when you think that the Cleveland Browns have turned the corner, and are headed towards being somewhat relevant, they go ahead and pull a classic Browns move that leaves everyone's heads spinning. The Cleveland Browns signed RB Kareem Hunt, who notoriously was jettisoned from the Kansas City Chiefs after video surfaced of him kicking … Continue reading The Browns Gon’ Browns
After a long hiatus, your favorite terrible father is back. Having kids really really puts a damper on your blogging but this motherfucker just filled his adderall prescription and I'm ready to go. Today I'm going to give you a list of the worst shows your future kids will watch and why they are so … Continue reading I’m back
The New York Football Giants are a miserable excuse for a football team. I'm disgusted to the point of needing to vomit, and no my excessive drinking during the game has nothing to do with it. This team, week after fucking week, further cements themselves as the laughing stock of the league. I'm shaving off … Continue reading Nothing Like A Good Ole Fashioned Dumpster Fire
I'm not doing this to myself, I'm not going to drink the Kool-Aid. The Giants went out, yesterday, and had a very solid game that displayed good things from each of the three phases of the game. Fuck that. I'm not sold, and refuse to have a false sense of security. First of all, the … Continue reading I Refuse To Be Lulled Into Believing The Giants Have Changed
Alright so since most of you have no idea who I am I'll give you a few details. I'm 6'5 316 lbs of Bearded man meat. I also have what the ladies refer to as "Resting Bitch Face". I just look angry all the time apparently. I can't count how many times I've been asked … Continue reading Why People?
The Jets are a disgrace. The NFL needs to come in and take action to remove the Jets from the league. This fucking team really lost to the god damn Browns. I wish I was in Cleveland near one of those fridges just so I could drink myself into a coma. 635 days since the … Continue reading Anyone know where I can get vats of bleach?
Just take a good, long minute to try and absorb what is going on in the above picture. This is not some post found from someone else on Twitter, this is from my own personal fucking Snapchat! THIS IS SOMETHING I HAD TO LIVE THROUGH! Here's the situation, entered the bathroom to handle some business … Continue reading Some Things Just Need Divine Intervention To Explain
Chewing loudly. People being late. People who talk about being vegan. People who stand still on the left side of the escalator (Hello NYC.) Those who don't say 'Thank you' when you hold open a door for them. All of these people are fucking awful. I will though, enter my pick for the absolute worst … Continue reading I Have Found My New Pet Peeve
I remember a time when the cool thing was to have a different ringtone for each person in your contacts..... Not anymore. There is nothing more annoying than being somewhere quiet and some moron's phone going off with their ringer on full blast. You can feel the mood in the room change as the younger … Continue reading It’s 2018. Put your damn phone on vibrate